EVAN, BUTTERFLY EFFECT AND ME

-- Something as small as the flutter of a butterfly’s wing can ultimately cause a typhoon halfway around the world -- chaos theory.

In a movie called “BUTTERFLY EFFECT” there is a guy named Evan who have ability to back to the past to fix something goes wrong. But everytime he make it, he also will make a change into any other things that already work well.

After seen it, I am wondering what will happen if I have the same gift as Evan, which things I would like to fix? Maybe I will only change one important thing in my life, my family. So instead of to be born in poor financially family which finally let go off me to another poor mentality family, I would like to have just normal family.

So then I will grow up like other kids, I’ll have nice family, I’ll have lovely childhood, I wouldn’t have jealousy which poisoning my soul. I will never stay close with drugs, alcohol and any other dark side of me. I will be in different stage by now, with better future.

That’s sounds good, but then what kind of person I will be? Spoil, arrogant, cruel, mature or what? Phewwww, it always tiring to think about other dimention .. but when I think again and again, from all the people in the world I could be, I would love to be my self now. I don’t want to fix anything because with everything I had in the past, I could reach this point, where I have my lovely old man, my nice Rita and Sybille.

So I guess I make my mind clear now, I don’t want to play God. I don’t want to change one or few things in my life, because it will also change what I have in the future. Im pretty happy to be a human being with by the best people around and I don’t want to loose or change whatever they are.

BACK TO THE START ..

On a cloudy and cold Thursday morning, on the way to the training centre, I heard old song which suddenly turns my feeling into blue mode. The song reminds to someone, which I ever had a story with. It wasn’t a nice story to tell, just few months full of tears, pain and hatred.

This person have everything what a girl wants: nice, smart, caring, loving, fun and off course cute, but there is one mistake: he already belong to somebody. In the beginning our relation was fine and smooth till we get into a very bumpy road to go. We also face lots of problem which aren’t worth to fight for. Then we decided to finish it for our own good.

I was regretting this way a lot, till I realize it was very good experience, which teach me to think twice before put trust on someone. It also teaches me to pay more attention to the one I love.

It takes sometimes to heal the pain, and now I’m back to the start, walk slowly on my path, try to move further without fall again into holes. It takes sometimes to be able to love somebody new, and now I’m back to the start, work hard to rebuild my broken boat after the storm, to sail to another harbor.

ME, MY FRIENDS AND THEIR FRIENDS

Last week I got a call from an old friend, he informs that my 'little ndut' will get married next months .. oh nooooo! She was my room mate at the dormitory house, we spend years together till I finish study. She is my left wing after Rita (she is the right one).

We were doing lot of crazy things, parties from dusk till dawn, silly girls talk, fighting over a cute boy, so and so. Not only the good times, we also share the bad times till I move out from the house as I’ve graduate from the university. It’s not allowed for a bachelor to stay with students .. silly regulation!

So we split up, just communicate by phone and sms. Then we lost contact as we’re to busy with our own business, me with the job and she with the bf. Years gone by and there is no news from her, till last week. Get married? At 23? Nooooo .. that’s not possible, u’re too young for this thing girl!

The funny thing is she will marry Budi, a friend of us who always became her shoulder to cry on whenever she have problem with her previous bf. This lucky man make big step, from a friend to share bullshit love story to a husband to share the real love story .. Anyway im happy for u guys, all I can do is just wish u all the best, cant hardly wait to be the auntie for ur kids (*gggg*). Be nice Mr and Mrs. Budi.

My left wing has broken and soon my right wing will do also. She is now together with also a friend of us (the world is so small huh?). They looks fine the last time I meet them during the home trip. She wait so long to meet him, and now they doing good job. They complete, loved, taking care and support each other.

I have feelings that soon she will be Mrs. Venus .. whuaaaa then when is my turn (*gggg*). Anyway be good guys, stick to whatever plans u have, fly together to ur destiny as I always said: 2 hearts, 2 souls, 2 mind .. one destiny, LOVE.

Dedicated for Budi-Andri (congratulation!), Venus-Rita (2007 0r 2008 guys?) ..

GILI’S UNDER WATER

Oct 29. After 2h driving along the coast, we arrived at Bangsal around 3, take the boat to the Gili Aer. It takes IDR 20.000/each for 10min boat trip. We stay at Gili Aer Hotel. Our room is very simple, with bamboo all over (include the furniture), open shower (with salty water), nice veranda with the sea view. After check in, we jump into the ‘salty’ swimming pool then walk along the private beach.

We stop at Mirage to take ‘sunset beers’ and very delicious pizza (better than Samaritan Purse). After the sun totally gone, we back to the hotel, take a shower and ready for dinner.

Oct 30. As always, we missed the breakfast, as we never able to wake up early. So we just take apple and start walk around. Its only takes 1h to go around the island. Soon we get bored and stop for lunch at a cafe full of rasta man. Finish with the spaghetti, fruit platter and off course cold beer, we jump to the nice blue and clean water. On the way back to the hotel we apply for snorkeling tour for the next day. IDR 70.000/each for 6h trip, not too bad.

Done with the shower thing, we walk along the private beach to catch the sunset, and after we had 2 very big fish for dinner at the romantic cafe beside the Mirage.

Oct 31. This time we made it, we wake up early enough to catch the breakfast .. yipieeee. Around 10, we and a French couple were already on the glass bottom boat to start the trip. First we snorkel around the gili aer where we saw the turtles swimming around. Then we move to gili meno and then continue to gili trawangan. It was the most great under water view, the reef wall, the colorful fish, and the corrals.

At 4 we sail back to the starting point, send back the mask and the fin before walking back to the hotel room. The old man was so tired till he fall a sleep in the veranda while Im swimming around still. After we take a shower, had sunset dinner at the Mirage, back to the hotel to do the packing and after that we’re all sleep like a log .. tired boooo!

Nov 1. Woke up, jump to the toilet, check out from hotel and went to the harbor to sail back to Bangsal. Then we drive to Lembar. At 12 our ferry supposed to go to Padang Bai, but until 2 we still there, u know lah Indonesian .. always late! So long Lombok, hopefully will catch u again some other time. Will never forget the fun and the pain during the holiday on this sasak area.

Shortly after the bumpy trip, we arrive safe in Bali (little bit headache actually). We take another 1,5h to drive to Ubud and catch the beautiful golden sun on the way. So next chapter will coming out soon (i duno when ...)